Rhetorical Question Friday
As you long-time readers know, here at the ‘Bloomr I have a tendency to just suddenly decide willy-nilly that it is going to be “International _______(fill in the blank) Day.” So in that spirit and for no good reason, I now pronounce that today is Rhetorical Question Friday!
Which I happen to think is infinitely classier than my first choice, “Bitching and Moaning Friday,” don’t you? (And that right there? IS A RHETORICAL QUESTION!!! See how I did that? Aren’t I just the best?)
This is your opportunity to put a voice (or more specifically, a keyboard) to all of those pesky queries you’ve longed to fling out there into the universe without really expecting an answer. They can be deep or silly, long or short, and can be put in categories such as (but not limited to): Family (spouses), Work (bosses), Traffic, Waiting in Line, Airports, Paperwork/Bureaucracy, and the ever-popular and universally inclusive They– as in, “WHY do They always…” or “How come They never…”
Got it? Ask as many as you want!
OK, I’ll start:
1. Why does Costco start carrying some wonderful product such as, oh I don’t know, Main St. Cafe Scalloped Potatoes, just long enough for you to decide they have to be a staple in your weekly menu because they are JUST THAT GOOD, I mean good to the point of being able to put them in one of your fancy casserole dishes and take them to a potluck and pass them off for homemade, not that I would, I’m just saying, but THEN decide for no dang good reason (and believe me, I ASKED) that they weren’t going to carry them anymore, but “might be bringing them back seasonally”??? And in a related rhetorical question, what is “seasonal” about potatoes, for crying out loud?
2. What is it about the onset of fall that apparently makes skunks suddenly decide to cross the road in the dark without looking both ways?
3. Why do I not remember that I have a whole giant pile of those environmentally-friendly reusable shopping bags in the trunk of my car UNTIL THE MOMENT I place the last of my many, many items on that little moveable belt thingy to be checked out and the bored high school kid about to start bagging my groceries asks me, “Paper or plastic?”
4. How many joggers have you ever seen that look really, really happy to be jogging?
5. How come aging enriches us on the inside by making us wiser, resilient and more aware of the important things in life while simultaneously kicking the crap out of us on the outside, by sagging our skin, expanding our butt, thinning our hair and creating the need for reading glasses that we constantly misplace because we can’t remember where we put them? (VERY FUNNY, universe!)
OK, your turn.
BUT FIRST– HERE”S A BONUS!!!
Years ago when we first bought our lake house in the little town of Smithville, there was a store there owned by the Walker Family that only sold two things. For real. I always deeply regretted not getting a picture of the sign hanging out front, but thanks to the wonder of the intrawebs and my penchant for Googling every little thing that pops into my pea brain, I found this image that I will now share with you as a lovely parting gift for playing our game:
(OK, NOW it’s your turn.)
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Why is it that when you purchase a large pepperoni pizza for your family of six, there is never enough to go around, so when you try to be the good mom and order a jumbo, it goes to waste and no one wants pizza?
And….shoes and cheese….gotcha beat…Near my college in River Falls WI, there is a store called Aves Taxidermy and Cheese. I always wanted to stop it, but was very, very afraid.
love ya!
Why is it for “Black Friday” you get up before the birds are even awake, drive to Wal Mart, get your voucher, stand in line for hours for the “special” buy item that you have been anticipating about for days & then when they FINALLY get to you…sorry, none of those are left!!!!Just tell me up front that there are only 2, 3, 4 etc. & save me some sleep time.
Why does International Delight constantly do the switchout with the coffee creamer flavors? First they took my Choc Chip Creme Brulee away (which, another question, why can I still find it in individual cups in random midwestern gas stations?) and now my Sweet Cream? You’re killing me, I.D.!
Why is there no Panera Bread or Chipotle in Horry County?
Why do I only live in counties with seriously laughable names?
Why is it that when I have the opportunity to pose a rhetorical question, I can’t think of any?
(Tori, did you hit a skunk with your car? Is that what Madi was talking about to her dates—–“Mom’s coming this weekend! I’m trying to get her to park WAY FAR AWAY from my dorm!”)
Okay, I thought of one…….why is it that when I finally get someone whom I’ve been praying for for a long time come to my church, the pastor’s sermon is a frank discussion about sex? And this really happened to me once—-after I’ve been bragging about our wonderful pastor to this person who was looking for a home church, and the first time they visit our church, why does he chose that Sunday to shock the congregation with his RESIGNATION? Everyone was walking around stunned afterward and not talking to anyone!
This is fun!
Oh, and here’s one for ya—-true story: why is it that when I bring my Muslim friend from Jordan with me to church to see how Christians worship, the opening hymn was, “On Jordan’s stormy banks I stand and cast a wishful eye on Canaan’s fair and happy banks where my possessions lie”? And they were immediately offended?
Taxidermy and Cheese store??? BAHAHAHAHA!!! LOVE IT! (Don’t try their stuffed brie!)
Why is it that the day that the two children who usually think 6 am is a good time to wake up decide to sleep past 7, the one who usually wakes after 7 decides 6 is the time to start making noise?
Why is it that the only night of the week no-one has any nightmares, coughing episodes, or disturbed sleep, the neighbours car alarm goes off repeatedly between 2-4am?
Why does the only rain shower of the day always come at school pick-up time?
Who invented playdough, and why did they think it was a good idea to give such a substance to toddlers?
Why do children think they can be heard when they are all asking different questions at the same time?
Why didn’t England get a summer this year?!
Rachel, I HEAR YA about the Playdough! And if any gets on the rug, and it dries and adheres tightly to it, you can like NEVER get it out! And it’s never the same color as your carpet! They should make Playdough in popular carpet colors!
Anyone would think I was a full-time Mum in need of a Tori patented ‘runaway mum weekend’ (2 weeks and counting).
Oh boy! Where ya goin’ in two weeks, Rachel?
My lovely housegroup (we call ourselves ‘desperate housewives’ but for some reason they won’t put that in the church notice sheet) are all going to a 1 day women’s conference in Manchester (north west England). Most of my friends are going down on the Friday night, sleeping at one of the ladies’ Mum’s house, and returning after the conference on the Saturday, but my closest friend and I saw an opportunity and we are going to take it. We are leaving as soon as the kids are at school on Friday, and are certainly not going to rush back on the Sunday. We’ve booked a couple of nights in a nice hotel and are looking forward to some proper relaxation – with maybe just a touch of adventure!
Why, even at age 11, does my child decide she wants to talk to me the minute I get on the phone, when for the prior 10 minutes or more it’s been dead quiet around the house.
Why can’t the mechanics ever find that annoying rattle that is so plainly noisy when I’m driving?
Why if everyone is going the same speed, in the same direction, is there always a traffic jam?
Why is it when I have a response to something from Wednesday’s post, Tori posts again so I know everyone isn’t checking the post before? (Did that make sense?)
But here goes anyway, LindaB–my friend posted this on Facebook and I thought of you!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_8TGTKdrlY
ROFLMBO OVER AND OVER!!!!!! I LOVE THIS COMMERCIAL!!!!! THANKS FOR THIS LAUGH, GRAMMA JAC!!!!! I’m keeping this FOREVER! LOL
I thought of another rhetorical question——why is that you child can have a fever of 125 degrees at home and you think she’s dying, and you drive to the ER and tell them how bad off she is, and they take her temp and it’s 98.6???
“Why is it that when I have the opportunity to pose a rhetorical question, I can’t think of any?”
With you on that one !! Oh, wait… Think I may be onto something here…
Why is it that when I suddenly realize I haven’t checked up on my Bloomr Buddies in awhile, I miss A LOT !!??? = / Great seeing a post or two from Barbara Lloyd again = ) Love that woman !!
I’m sorry I can’t think of a rhetorical question right now – but I CAN tell you something else: Today I have reached another milestone in terms of professional training; I didn’t have a chance to verify what it is called in English but it’s described like that: I’m now a translator under general oath for English and French for the courts and notaries in Germany!
(I made my way through bureaucracy I can tell you!)
WOW !!! Congrats, delighted !!!!! Woooo – hooooo……. = D
Well done Delighted. I never was any good at languages I am impressed.
I hear ya, jonny. It’s kind of lonely in Bloomrland lately. I know our fearless and tireless leader must be really busy right now!
Delighted, WOW! WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT!!! I certainly admire your determination! You can be proud of this milestone, Girl! We are proud of you!
Congrats, Delighted!
Well done, Delighted. That’s an amazing achievement!
Well, thank you, jonny. How very sweet of you.
Golly gee whiz, Delighted, that is fantastic!