As we say in the South: I am stove up and wo’ out. Also? I’m not sure but I think I am now probably banned from Taco Bell.

OK, apparently when I was planting those beautiful flowers on my deck I did something to my back.

I didn’t have a BOING!!! moment where I clutched my back and fell over, I just felt kind of stiff and ouchy the next day. Then, just in time for the flood it started hurting to the point that I spent the better part of two days in bed– which is SO not me, but whaddya gonna do. On Monday it felt a little better so I went out and got groceries and all was well. I felt a little bit stiff here and there, no problems. But yesterday I went to Target, and as I was strolling around the store my back and hip on my left side REALLY started hurting. I left the store and headed home, but I suddenly realized that if I was going to take pain medicine when I got home I had better get something in my stomach since I hadn’t eaten anything yet. I was driving right past a Taco Bell, so I decided to whip in the drive-thru and grab something. By the time I was paying for my food, I was in serious pain and I knew I couldn’t drive, so I pulled into their parking lot and eased myself out of the car. That’s when I found out that not only could I not sit, but apparently I couldn’t walk either! I wish I could get a security videotape of myself in that parking lot, it was hilarious! I would take two steps, stop and clutch the side of the car, start to sit down, then raise back up and try to walk into the building, then hobble back to the car, then try to retrieve my purse but couldn’t bend over, then clutch the car again, then try to sit down again… I looked like I was a drunk who couldn’t make up her mind if I was coming or going– and did I mention I was crying the whole time?!

I finally made it into Taco Bell and laid myself out across a row of  those turquoise plastic bucket chairs and called Russ. I had to hold my back in a certain position to keep the stabby pains at bay, so I was kind of half sitting up and twisted to one side hanging on for dear life to the top of the chairs. And crying. It kind of appeared as if I was trying to mate with the chair, it was not an attractive look. Here’s the weirdest thing– not one person came up to me and asked if something was wrong! I guess the crying part kind of threw them, I know it did me! The people behind the counter were young, like high school or early college age, and either they didn’t notice or they just decided to ignore me and hope I’d go away. When Russ and Madi arrived, they gave me two pain pills and we waited about 20 minutes and then they half-carried me out to Russ’ SUV, where he had laid the seat down and they hauled me into the back of it like a big ol’ bag of groceries and Madi drove me home while Russ took my car.

Since then I have been piled up in my bed with ice packs and a heating pad. I have also consumed more pills in the last two days than I probably have taken in my entire life!  I am taking steroids, muscle relaxers, heavy-duty pain meds, and anti-inflammatory pills. And sadly, though I am taking enough pain pills to stun an elephant, I am not even remotely high. I am as lucid as I usually am, which granted, is not saying a lot, but come on– if I have to put up with stabby ouchy killer pain, you’d think I could at least be kind of dopey and dreamy and drowsy and silly…. Not a chance. I am wide-stinkin’ awake and as clear-headed as an air traffic controller. Apparently I would make a lousy drug addict.

My doctor thinks it is a ruptured disc and we are trying to get my pain level down enough to be able to transport me to get an MRI, but so far I can’t sit up enough for the car ride. Russ, by the way, is being a prince– he is waiting on me hand and foot which I would enjoy a lot more if I wasn’t preoccupied with THE STABBY OUCHY OMG IT HURTS! part of this whole thing. He is leaving tonight for the weekend, but we found someone to come and stay with me, thank God (oh hai Amy! I’ll try not to wear you out!)

I’ll try to check in later, but it’s kind of hard to use the laptop for very long– dang, you KNOW I’m out of commission if I’m not on my computer! I would appreciate your prayers, but honestly, as I watch the images on my TV screen of all of the people who have been so terribly affected by the flooding here in Nashville, it is hard to feel too sorry for myself. It is still a real mess out there, and there are still a lot of people without power, etc. My brother Matt had about 5 feet of water in his basement, which completely ruined his heating and air conditioning unit, hot water heater, and anything else he had down there. The death toll for Tennessee has now risen to 21– so there are many, many families out there who have a lot more to worry about than a sore back.

Love you guys– be back soon!

17 Responses

  1. ibclcisme

    Oh my goodness, Tori!! I’ll be praying for you! Hang in there!

  2. Phyllis R

    Mercy sakes Tori, back pain makes you miserable all over. I hope you are doing better and you continue to improve.

  3. meb

    Praying for quick diagnosis/healing for you and for everyone else in the area affected by the flood.

  4. ginnh

    Hi Tory – Saying prayers here for you too. I think I’m going to have to say that Taco Bell management at that store needs to be aware of the actions of their employees. What if it was something life threatening? To ignore someone in that much distress is unbelievable. I know you are a sweet loving person that doesn’t think that way but you should never have had to go through that. At the very least they should give you free taco’s for life :).

  5. rockin robyn

    Oh Tori! God bless you and I’m so sorry about your back… That’s too bad. I am praying for the pain to subside so you can get that checked out. Back pain is not fun, I’m sure. You take care.

  6. swerchon

    Oh My sweet Tori,
    Praying for you. Praying that those OUCHIES leave you and that your back heals. God bless you my dear and get better real soon.

    Love
    Susan

  7. LindaB

    Holy Tamale!! That was TERRIBLE, Tori! You poor little thing! When I first heard you had some back problem, my thoughts were, “Oh no! Zumba!!” But it was a planting accident! And of all days to be laid up——–it’s Tablescape Thursday!!

    I hope you find relief soon!!!! And if those pain meds and muscle relaxants aren’t doin’ the job, I have two words for ya——–NYQUIL! (But I guess that’s ONE word……it just sounds like two.) I’ve had bronchitis for three weeks now and Nyquil is my new best friend! If I have another grandchild, I’m gonna ask my daughter to name the baby Nyquil! It’s wonderful stuff if you have trouble sleeping because you’re back is aching bad or you’re coughing up lungs! Two tablespoons and it’s Nyte Nyte Baby! You can thank me later…….like when you wake up sometime next week.

    (I know it has 10% alcohol……….but give me a break! 10% is just a little bit and hey! It’s MEDICINAL!

    (So…..what’d you say to Russ when you called him? “Hey Russ! Listen! I’m balancing precariously on the chairs in Taco Bell and cryin’. I can’t move. Will you come get me? And will you buy me a taco when you get here? Mild sauce? )

    Love you and prayin’ for ya! God is big enough to cover Nashville and you too!

  8. wendmark

    My goodness Tori, you certainly do have our prayers girl! Love to you, Russ and the girls! Praying for a speedy recovery and really praying that you do not have a ruptured disc. Not fun! Love and prayers to you Tori!

  9. jonny

    I don’t think the word ‘mild’ is in her vocabulary, LB… = /

  10. Stribet Kat

    praying for you and all those impacted by the flood.

  11. LindaB

    Folks, I am asking you all to pray tonight for Betty (the mema). She has taken a turn for the worst and is in intensive care with pneumonia and labored breathing. Please ask the Lord to spare her life and help her recover her health.

  12. rachelbaker

    LindaB – just read Robyn’s report on the carepages website. Praying hard.

  13. Barbara M. Lloyd

    Oh my goodness…there are many prayers going up for the Tori we all love.

  14. Tanya Sykes

    Tori, i hate to admit this, because I know you were in such great pain, but I was laughing so hard I could barely read this! You are HILARIOUS! I loved the part about how you looked like you were trying to mate with the chair and that no one even bothered to come over and see about you. I’m glad you’re much better now. XOX, Tanya

  15. jd2008

    Aww. You poor thing…of course I feel bad because I was laughing out loud because of your pain….Charlotte told me to read your blog. She texted me saying: You are never gonna believe what happened to my mom…read her blog for more details. (Sounds kinda like an infomercial…”read the blog for more details…” I love your blog.

    Jess

  16. DELIVEREDJEPARKER63

    AWWW, tORI – I HAVE BEEN KEEPING UP W/ YOU ON fb, BUT THIS, i’M SORRY, WAS hilarious!

  17. DonnaMariePatterson

    Through all this pain and suffering, I was CRACKING UP! (Only because I know you’re better now 6/9/10 …. well, truthfully, I would have laughed just as hard on 5/6/10!) I’m glad that you got to go to Gatlinburg eventhough you weren’t 100% You’re great at 40%

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