I am not dead, just Neti-potted.

Allergies are kicking my butt, which is just one of the many reasons my posts have been so light this week. I am kinda miserable. So miserable that I was even willing to resort to the neti pot, or as my friend Patsy likes to call it, ‘the poor man’s waterboarding.’ This is the first time I’ve ever used one and let’s just say… it wasn’t pretty. Thank goodness nobody had a camera in my bathroom a few minutes ago! I started to post a YouTube video of a guy using a Bob the Builder sippy cup as a neti pot just to give you an idea of how gross and um, WET the whole experience can be (plus it was really, really funny!) but I realize that not everyone enjoys the sight of water pouring out of another person’s nasal passages, especially if said person is a really big guy with a lot of piercings who cackles maniacally throughout the whole thing, so I decided to spare you and just show this very toned down and sanitized version:

(This is not me, by the way. She just plays me on TV.)

Well, now that I have experienced self-induced slow-motion drowning, I think I will call it a night and hope that tomorrow I will feel well enough to post some REALLY cute photos of Charlotte and Madi I took this week. I would like to mention however, that I did not allow my screaming sinuses to keep me from my Friday Zumba class because I am a whiny brave little soldier that way.

I’ll leave you with an artistic shot of my dinner tonight. On the menu: an artichoke as big as my head with lemon tarragon mayonnaise. Yes, that’s right– I have now officially scraped the bottom of the blogging barrel and posted a picture of my dang dinner! But you have to admit, that is an big ol’ artichoke, right?

(I added the phone to give a sense of scale. Because the Yorkies wouldn’t stay still.)

33 Responses

  1. themema

    I am awaiting anxiously for the results of your first adventure into sinus flushing! I’m sure it will be graphic and funny has… well, you know. So, you can tell us if waterboarding is real torture! I can’t believe it would be worse than Zumba.

    Watched your dear sweet husband host Praise the Lord tonight and was sorely disappointed that he didn’t sing a single song. Or, please don’t tell me, he opened. I tuned in 8 minutes late and watched the whole two hours, hoping he would close. Oh well, I’ll just put on a CD and go to bed.

    Hope you will post a picture of the pink roses in Madi’s room.

    Now one last thing. Did you eat the whole thing?

  2. jonny

    I miss artichoke…

  3. nashbabe

    Now see, that wasn’t torture, was it? ;-)

    If you need relief on the run, saline sprays are also available. “Ocean” is the best known, but I think “Ayr” is a little easier to handle. Just my two cents.

    Sufferin’ over here in Hispantioch too…sinuses, be ye gone. The ENT’s and allergists in this town laugh all the way to the golf course. ;-)

  4. rockin robyn

    I have one word for ya… YUK??? and that’s for that big green thing on your table. How do you even begin to put that in your face.

    I’m sorry you’re feeling yuk–eee…. I never tried that potted thingy. I never even heard of it until lately – my sister tried to get me to do it when I wasn’t feeling well.

    Does it really work?

  5. tori

    themema– I’m not sure if he sang…? Surely he did. You’re probably right, it must have been the opener. YES, I survived and YES, it was very… blog-worthy.

    jonny– No artichokes where you are? That’s just not right!

    nashbabe– No, it wasn’t all that bad. Weird, but not horrible. I know it definitely helped, but I did have a rough night, woke up a lot, throat hurts. You too, huh? Allergies blow. Literally.

    rockin robyn– Oh honey, that big green thing is DIVINE! I love artichokes with a deep and abiding love. I can now go on record as recommending the neti pot, if you’re feeling brave.

  6. jonny

    I know one vocalist who uses a neti pot before going on stage. He was caught once by a fan, who apparently also uses one but come out of the closet after discovering his idol using his!! He’s been seen publically singing its praises, now that he’s got some back-up = ) I’m not so sure my friend was too keen on his back-stage “opening up” methodes being made public, though
    = / And yes, Tori, sad but true, artichokes are hard to come by over here. Especially big healthy ones like in your photo! I’ve had a few over the years, but they were definately on the whimpy side of this great food. I do hope you’re using light mayo with it, though!

  7. auburn60

    Alright, Tori, you’d best not be getting the swine flu–not with FF just around the corner. Madi and I’ve been making plans for FF–although I have no illusions–in reality, she’ll want to spend every minute with ‘the boy’.
    I’m afraid by the time FF gets here we’ll all be wearing masks. Won’t that make for interesting singing?

  8. LindaB

    So…..did you name that artichoke? Roadster (as in Buick) maybe?

  9. jonny

    OK, just realized I missed a great opportunity to use the word “emboldened”.

  10. justThelma

    THANK YOU for not sharing the details of your neti pot experience! The sanitized picture you included was sufficient. Ewwwww….

    Then I saw, “I’ll leave you with an artistic shot of my dinner tonight”, and before I read further, I glanced at the photo. My first thought? “She’s eating a turtle???”

    Yeah, I really need to get out more.

  11. Barbara M. Lloyd

    Gracious, I use a neti pot all of the time and it is both painless and simple…if used the right way. (lol) I laugh because I can just imagine the antics you put forth, Tori dear.

    Not only is the neti pot good to use when your sinus is raging…but before you go out into a crowd as a deterant from catching the flu, for example.

    Now about that artichoke….was it as flavorful as the small ones? even so, it is impressive. Sorry you are feeling poorly, sweet pea.

  12. tori

    I came, I saw, I neti-ed.

    The artichoke was absolutely delicious, I have another one in the fridge I may go eat right now!

    I still feel like crap on a cracker.

  13. CarolynR

    Never ever heard of neti pot!!! Sort of a colonic irrigation, but further north, I’m guessing! You poor old thing. Hope your passages become unblocked and free flowing again.

    BTW I hope you enjoyed your armadillo dip! :)

  14. sammifredenburg

    i’d seen one of those things (not in action, thanx Lord) in a friend’s bathroom, fearing that it was maybe a waterpipe of the current decade! i chose to figure it was none of my business but would intercede for whoever used it, actually i’m taking comfort in knowing it has medicinal purposes.

    now as for that artichoke on steroids – whoa! they grow them big where you are! ours are about half the size, and surely double the price.

    hope things are coming together for London!

    stay close,

    sammi =)

  15. sammifredenburg

    sigh* now i’ve got this song stuck in my head:

    “i’m not crazy i’m just a little unwell . . . . . “

  16. carsmith

    Much to my family’s approval, I’ve never purchased or prepared a fresh artichoke. Never…ever…have I seen one that was as large as a watermelon. I’m thinking two of those big boy’s filled your fridge. Now I will be on a mission to find one. Guess I should be ashamed of the can of puny size artichokes in my pantry.

    Never tried the fancy neti pot but I have laughed so hard milk, coke or tea has cleared my sinus.

    Jim and I went to London on a European tour a few years ago. Enjoyed the cruise on the Thames, seeing Big Ben and London Bridge. We toured the Tower of London; saw Ravens, St Paul’s Cathedral, the Crown Jewels, Piccadilly Circus and the Lion King. Stood in front of Buckingham Palace and watched the parade and the changing of the guards. The girls are going to have a blast and the trip will certainly make great family memories.

  17. MostlySunny

    No, thank you, on both (the Neti and the arti…)!

  18. sammifredenburg

    laughter does your heart good like a medicine:


    “May the 4th be with you!”

  19. LindaB

    HEY!!! I JUST GOT IT!!! Since when is pictures of food not art, and delicious art at that!!!! The bottom of the blogging barrel??? I think NOT!!!


    Hi guys! Had to wait until today to comment – didn’t bring my password yesterday, sure as h**l can’t remember it! But, EEEEWWWWW, I will just suffer w/ my allergies rather than to pour water up (or down?) my sinuses! Have had 2 broken noses which were reset w/out pain medication, am not excited at all about putting anything in my nostrils! The picture even made me shiver, just YUK!

    And, just how big do artichokes get? Have never tried the lemon-tarragon sauce. That has to be the mac-daddy of artichokes!
    Sinuses will continue to itch and drip, and now mouth salivating, as well. Need a blanket-sized kleenex! Johnnie


    PS – Have never even heard of this allergy relief process until this blog! What else am I missing? Have been in the twilight zone for too long!

  22. jonny

    OK, I just had an opportunity to ever so briefly meet Sir Roger Moore and his truly lovely wife. A unique, interesting pleasure.

  23. jonny

    OK, realized the Sir Roger Moore post should’ve probably been added to the Dang London thread. He was reportedly born there after all = /

  24. GRITSinNC

    I’ve been lurking off and on for some time and was encouraged by someone I met on another board to get over my shyness about my elderly status :o) and join in. I almost jumped in when you were collecting the recipes because I love recipes…though I don’t cook much anymore.

    Just had to comment on that artichoke. NEVER saw one that big. Was it as good tasting as smaller ones? Does your family eat them? My family wouldn’t eat them so I seldom had the pleasure myself. Think I’ll get myself one next time I’m at the store.

    Love your style of writing and your humor. You and Russ are lucky to have each other.

    Sorry if my first post is too long. :o)

  25. belinda

    Just checking to see if you are any better. Hang in there!


    Hey, GRITSinNC – another fellow Tarheel? Hope so! I lurked for months, mostly b/c I couldn’t figure out how to get in! Lots of times was just too busy laughing my a** off anyway! No one can see how old you are anyway on this dang thang! If ya’ll could see how crazzzy I look half the time, I would have never gotten a password! Glad you broke out of your shell! Did you have tornados last night? We were close!

  27. GRITSinNC

    Hi DELIVEREDJEPARKER63! That’s a kinda long user name ya know. :o) Glad to see another Tar Heel here. We were close to getting a tornado too…in WARNING stage. I’d have been okay if I hadn’t turned on the TV and learned that bit of informmation…that it was just a few miles down the road, and just accepted a nice hard rainstorm. There’re predicting more of the same this afternoon so I’m going to keep the TV off and just be ignorant rather than scared. I’m wondering if you are close to the same area as me or the ones that actually hit further east? If you’re a Parker, we might be closer than we realize. Just thinking of Ivan & Danny. :o)

  28. jonny

    Actually, DELIVERED does have a longer name GRITSinNC, but you both have rather LOUD names! = ) I wonder if it’s somehow connected with you both being a Tar Heel, or are you both, possibly, just a little deaf?? ; ) ; ) ; ) And, welcome aboard, thanks for breaking the ice GRITS!! = )


    To : GRITSinNC & jonny: Yeah, it is a long name, didn’t know it would all be used. Thought for some time that I would never even get up here! I am near Rocky Mount & Tarboro, a little wonderful 2 stoplight town called Pinetops, about 45 mintues fromm Raleigh, about 1 hour from the beach, about 4 hours from the mts., low crime rate, (especially after I met Jesus!), best place in the whole world to live! I can walk 2 blocks to my job, 1 block to my church and library. Have lived in NYC, Atlanta, & all over NC, this is tha’ best. Grew up in Winston-Salem/High Point area. Tornado hit approx. 2 miles from my home, tore up about 15 power lines, took many shingles off homes, no injuries, praise to my God. I wasn’t watching TV, either, so wasn’t aware of tornado until this AM when I arrived at school, & it looked little scary at that time, as well! As to being a Parker, my family is from Oxford, grandfather was from outside Charlotte. Oxford family were Fullers and Peeds. I am not aware of any more living relatives, (in the flesh, that is! got lots of spiritual bros and sis!).

    As to the being loud – Actually, I am a very loud, lively excited – exhuberant person, but I am extremely loud when it comes to my spectacular deliverance from 15 year bondage to crack cocaine, 26 years of cigarettes and alcohol, not to mention the other demons of other drug usage such as heroin and weed, prostitution, adultery, fornication, profanity, suicide, loneliness, depression that He delivered me from – so, yeah, I get loud over that, it’s spiritual, not demographics or geographics. Got alot to be loud about! =) My friends get annoyed at my computer skills.

    But, I will try to tone it down a bit.
    Jonny, I must say that I have been more interested in your comments than some of the others, and have wondered, “Just who is this other Jonny? Where in the world is she?” You have been a puzzle. Have enjoyed many of your comments. I see that you spell you name differently than I do – mine is Johnnie, named after my grandmother, so, NO, my mom didn’t want a boy!


    Tori – I guess you can obviously disregard the panic-stricken email, and go ahead & exhale youself, (as if you were really sitting there holding your breath!). Will, for the fun of it, though, send you the new password so you can see what I am talking about! Glad to be back in. Got some pics to send you later.

    Isn’t this fun?

  31. jonny

    Thanks for your kind words about my Saying it!, DELIVERED! Truly appreciated. And sorry it’s taken so long to comment on your post here. I read it shortly after you posted it, but was in and out of a couple hospitals last week and seem to be responding to things more than a little backwards now that I’m more free to do so! A real gift being able to read all Christ has done and is doing in your life! Also great to read you have wonderful brothers and sisters loving and supporting you = ) You, your child, I’m guessing from what you’ve written earlier you have just one, have been in my heart, thoughts and prayers. You just keep going, girl! Also great to read Christ has you in a location you seem to enjoy and thrive in = ) Sounds like a truly beautiful place to live as well!! If you’ve read any of the earlier posts recently you’ve probably figured out by now that I’m a he and not a she = / I hope it wasn’t too big of a shock for you finding this out = ) I live in Helsinki, Finland. Pretty much in the heart of the center and one of the two most expensive areas to live in in Helsinki. The apartment was pretty much a gift from one women at a church I help out with the music at and occasionaly do a little speaking, sharing. Other wise there would be no way I could afford living here = ) She also seems to be very understanding when all of the rent isn’t paid on time. I pretty much live by faith, a day at a time, doing that which I believe He’s interested in me being a part of. I hope this is enough info about myself for you for now. There’s some other stuff I shared out there as well now! Peace, and stay beautiful in Him! Much love, the other jonny!!

  32. Leisa Hammett

    BTW: I cured my allergies with The Pot. Netti Pot, that is. Took five years. I’m now snot free during grass season, which used to mean I went running and screaming, tissues flyin’, indoors and never ventured outside again until summer arrived and IT quite bloomin’. Congratulations. You’ve joined…The Tribe.

  33. Leisa Hammett

    There is no such thing as an original idea…you just beat me to it. And ur credited….http://leisahammett.typepad.com/the_journey_with_grace/2009/05/i-cured-my-allergies-1.html

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