Nick Nack Paddy Wack
Catherine at herbadmother.com wrote a blog post the other day that I just loved. She has two darling children named Jasper and Emilia, and she wrote about all of the nonsensical nicknames that have evolved within their family since they were born. It made me start thinking about the weird things we call each other around THIS house, and then I got curious about your houses as well…
OK, I’ll start. I’m the youngest of six kids, and my mom was determined that all of our beautiful names were NOT going to be shortened. She named us (in order): Carolyn, Matthew, Joel, Jonathan, Elizabeth and Victoria. Well, of course she was only about two kids in when she figured out that one way or another, nicknames were inevitable. By the time she got to me she even picked it out herself, which is why I am Tori instead of Vicki, I guess. So we became (in order): Carrie, Matt, Joely, Jonny, Liz and Tori the Baby. OK, I just made up ‘the Baby’ part, but Daddy does still occasionally introduce me to people as the baby of the family– and I gotta tell you, at 53, I’m fine with that. Within the family we added a few addendums to the accepted nicknames. For some reason when I was about 12 I started calling Liz, “Lizzie the Fizzie the Queen of the Blues.” You can imagine her delight. *edited to add* (Liz just sent a Facebook message to remind me that I also used to call her “Lulu” which she also hated with a passion. And now that’s what her beloved granddaughter calls her. You’re welcome.) Add to that the fact that she got one hickey in her entire life and I blackmailed her about it for two solid years, and you will understand why I am still a little bemused by the fact that she didn’t kill me in my sleep. Mom and Dad sometimes call Matt, “Da Mappoo” which is apparently something he called himself when he was just a wee toddler. And back when we were disgruntled teenagers Liz and I used to call Jonny “The Favorite,” because, hello, he totally WAS.
Fast forward to the family I live with now. Here are my nicknames: Russ calls me “Shug,” short for sugar because you know, I’m sweet like that. Madi calls me “Toria.” My friend Becca Sparks calls me “Tor-Tor.” Bonnie Keen calls me “Tor-ree-yuh,” drawled out into as many syllables as humanly possible. (I call her “Bonzai.”) Michael Omartian used to call me “Toree-adoree,” sung to the tune of The Toreador Song. I always liked that one. In high school, I was “TT.” (My maiden name was Timm. Yeah, I know. Tori Timm Taff. Yuk it up.)
Russ is generally just called Russ or occasionally Russell by everybody except me. I’ve always called him “Artie,” which stands for his initials, R.T. That can also sometimes turn into “Arts,” or even “Arts and Crafts.” I also love to affectionately refer to him as “Uncle Russ-hole,” which one of his little nephews in California actually called him once and of course, I will never let him forget it. Also Pat Boone used to call him “Leather Lungs,” and one time at the Dove Awards Glen Campbell introduced him as “Ross.” That’s about it.
Madi Rose isn’t crazy about being called “Mad” by some of her friends, so I lengthened it to “Mad Dog.” When Charlotte was a baby, she couldn’t pronounce her big sister’s name so it turned into “Mee Wose.” How cute is that?
Before Charlotte was born, I decided I’d be smart like Mom and go ahead and pick her nickname out myself. I wanted to call her “Lottie”– I thought that it had a sweet, old fashioned sound to it, so I told everyone that’s what we’d call her for short. Then she got here, and I just couldn’t go through with it. I have no idea why, but she was just a Charlotte– “Lottie” didn’t fit her! For some bizarre reason though, I did start referring to her as “Latte”, like the drink. Actually, I still call her “Mocha Latte” sometimes. Usually I just call her “Charlo,” but it was our dear friend Becca Stevens that dubbed her with the nickname that we all still use, which is “Char-Char.” Oh yeah, and when she was a tiny–and I DO mean tiny, skinny baby– who inexplicably had a big appetite, Madi used to call her “Big Fat.”
And before you ask, yes, the dogs have nicknames too. Lots of them. I can even say a couple of them in polite company– Pip “the Squeak” is also known as “Pippy Boy” and “The Old Man.” Thea is often called by her full name, which is “Thea Madea, The Strong Black Woman.” Phoebe is usually “Feebs,” except by my dad who thinks her name is “Fifi,” which mortifies her. Also, for reasons I don’t feel compelled to explain they are collectively referred to as “The Poopers.”
That’s it for us. Tell me yours!
